Have More Fun with Your Children!
Toy Cubby
Do you want to have more fun with your children? Whilst we love our children with all our might, and being with them is joyful (especially when they are being co-operative), the act of 'parenting' can seem like the world's toughest job. Sometimes, even the most disciplined and unwavering parent will concede to the undisputable fact that parenting can be frustrating and dare I say it, even boring. Are you tired of the humdrum? The routines, the constant need to discipline, over-filled schedules, tantrums, the daily repetition of household chores and a sheer lack of time? Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could increase the fun factor to alleviate the horrid aspects of these and more? Imagine that.
Toy Cubby
We can! Try these tactics to raise the fun factor in your home.
Create rhythm in your home.
A rhythm is what a routine is not. Think of the ebb and flow of a wave, or the turning of the seasons. A daily rhythm involves giving the children time each and every day to play, to cook, to rest and to be outside, yet involves no ticking clock or army-like discipline. Instead, the parents prepare and hold the space for the scheduled task of the moment or period (say, between breakfast and morning tea), and use agreeable transitions of exuberant songs and mindful stories to propel the children through the day with the least trouble or intervention. Daily rhythms can be supported by a weekly rhythm. This may encourage families to follow long-held traditions and fill their week with a baking or cooking day, a cleaning day, a washing day, a family fun day and a restful day. These rhythms support the child to know exactly what is going to occur, each day and week. Daily and weekly rhythms 'hold' children and give them a feeling of security and safety. Families can expand their home life with a thoughtful yearly rhythm to house creative 'rituals' for individual families. This might involve celebrations such as an annual passata (tomato sauce) making day, an annual camping trip to the lake, or being home for the yearly visit from Santa in his rural fire truck. A yearly rhythm plans for special days that will be revisited with little change, year after year. This predictability creates safe, happy little children who know what to do and where to go, reducing your need for behavior intervention or rigorous disciplinary tactics and paves the way for more fun!
Nurture independent play
When little children engage in independent play, it is wondrous to watch. A child's imagination is unlimited when their life is filled with wonderful raw materials they can then transform. A treasure trove of shells, blocks, seedpods, wooden curtain rings, pots, pans, plain coloured cloths and simple dolls on display provide the fodder for a child to build and create their own reality and vision. Sadly, this ability to play is becoming something we need to protect. The world we live in is hiding this ability beneath mounds and layers of information and stimulation overload. A diet of television and media images and entertainment such as DVD's, Gameboys and Xbox cram the child's mind until the seed of original content is unable to find its way out of the maze. Reducing, or ultimately stopping, the information overload is helpful for creating a space that will allow the child's own imagination to flourish. And children can teach us a big lesson too. Just watch how effortlessly they play. They don't need cajoling to begin, they dive right in and in fact one of the hardest things a parent faces is trying to stop the children playing! Take a hint from the kids and invite play back into your life too. This weekend, make time to do something playful. Hire a bike for a city weekend jaunt, book a sky dive, roller skate to retro tunes, or run off to the circus for a weekend of high-flying trapeze escapades. Happy, joy-filled parents make for a fun-filled family life.
Give stories a big bear hug
A magical journey begins for the child when we begin to tell them stories. Telling stories involves more than reading a story from a book. It requires our energy and our time to give our children the gift of having the ability to create an inner picture. When we share colourful and descriptive stories, our children are inspired to use their imagination to create a detailed moving picture in their own head. They use the words they hear to build their own interpretations of how a character looks, speaks and behaves. (The ability to create inner picture imaginations is lost with the overstimulation and overload of preconceived ideas subjected upon our children). A strong inner-picture making ability is the thing that separates truly creative children from the rest. Might it be the key to intelligence? Maybe. Do not restrict your imagination-building storytelling activities to 6pm. The whole day is brimming with storytelling opportunity. Grab hold of a moment and inject a dose of storytelling magic into their world. Use props, character voices and household objects to make your point. Or why not wrap yourself in a homemade costume? Tell stories by the light of a marshmallow-melting fire or on a walk in the park, under a tree or high up in the branches. Turn storytelling on its head and make magic happen.
Discipline with creativity
Too often as parents, we discipline in the haste of the moment and regret our actions later. Doing a little bit of preplanning, talking, sharing and goal setting with our husbands and wives and families can help us to act in a way that is in alignment with our homely ideals. This reduces our guilt, which makes more space for fun! (Oh, how many minutes and hours we have wasted rehashing 'could have done' and 'should have done' actions after an unfortunate incident. No more.) Looking forward and being prepared means we have the opportunity to create "conscious consequences" for the unfortunate actions of our children. A "conscious consequence" makes it possible for us to remove the 'child' from the equation, and instead discipline the 'action' for a better result all round. If a child spills milk on the floor, the child can be calmly and quietly shown how to help clean it up, without recriminations. If we can then give them another opportunity to succeed at the task, in this case pouring a second glass of milk, just imagine the scope of learning that will take place. If a child hurts another, the conscious consequence can be that the child is shown how to care for the injured party. They learn to correct their own misdemeanor by bringing an icepack, a glass of water or a tissue for the hurt friend. Helping children to learn from their mistakes encourages them to be part of a solution, rather than holding them responsible for 'being' the problem. Children learn that they can trust the adults who surround them when they are met with understanding yet firm resolve. When trusting becomes the norm, children are highly motivated to cooperate simply to sustain the positive physiological responses they hold in their body and mind.
Parents can also try using story as a creative and fun way to alter and transform difficulties. By putting a difficulty into a story setting, the children have an opportunity to see the challenge and brainstorm solutions without it upsetting their ego development. Stories can also help you direct children to do what you ask without them even knowing your secret agenda!
Move creatively through your day
Our days are filled with many activities and transitions. If we can harness a dose of our creativity, we can begin to think of the ways we might use our tricks and treats to move our children along peacefully. The more the children move along with grace, the more time we have to do our thing. A song, a rhyme, a joke, a game, a story or a movement task can all help our children to transition smoothly from one part of the day to another. Whether we are dealing with mealtimes, bathing, sleep time, waking or packing up, our creative forces can help us reduce the pain and suffering of listening to whining and tired children. Take mealtimes for instance. Children love ritual and a mealtime is made so much more fun with a daily verse or song, a lighting of a candle and perhaps a time of sharing. Perhaps the children can spend some time making a special drawing each for a placemat (easily laminated at your local printers), embroidering a napkin for each member of the family, or making a special vase for the table. The children could take turns setting the table and collecting flowers for the vase. (Flower collecting might just inspire a new generation of gardeners at your house) Or packing up the toys time.
Reduce the hostile vibe of pack away time by allocating a specially designated space in your lounge room for their toys. (A detachable curtain can later hide this from view) After a period of play, sing a funky little tune of tidy up or be surprised and inspired by 'Orderly Elf who tidies the Shelf'. Having individual baskets for different types of items is doubly helpful in teaching children how to sort and store. A dose of extra care towards the toys also reduces the effort it takes to mend and repair.
Handy Work
All children love to make and create but I've often wondered what implicit message we give them when we only offer our offcuts and leftovers, boxes and toilet rolls and scrap paper? I truly believe in giving children (from age 3 onwards) the same quality tools and materials that we would use to create with, and designate the time to show them how to use and care for the tools. If cost is a factor, think of it as an investment for the child's future. I also firmly believe that every child should be taught how to use a needle and thread to sew, (running, back and blanket stitches top my three must-have skills) use a hammer and nail, master basic cookery and learn to knit. If we can use creative means to make this fun and engaging, such as using a verse to help a child remember the steps or hand dyeing our own knitting wool with onion skins and leaves, a child has the ability to make anything they so desire. Truly. They can embroider their name onto their own pillow for rest time, create felt stockings for the Christmas tree and sew, hammer or bake handmade gifts for one and all. When a child can finger knit or plait ropes, they can master cubby building, skipping and toy making. Their only limit is their imagination. Teaching our children the joys of handy work is a gift we give them that returns multiplied.
Spend time in nature
The natural world is overflowing with sensory satisfaction. Smells to enjoy, sights to behold, butterflies to befriend, foods to savour and the best thing of all, wonder at the magnificence of life. A child who is allowed and even encouraged to spend time, a little every day, in the exploration of nature is a child who will never be bored. Begin early, giving them free time to wander and dig and search to sow the seeds of beauty and reverence. One who has planted a tree and watched it grow over months and years learns that good things take time, that one must keep striving and pushing ahead to achieve greatness. There are many glorious and fun lessons to be learnt from nature. It is fun for us too! Why not try munching on juicy apples straight from the tree, view stunning rainbows or ogle animals in the wild? White water raft down the rapids, scale mountains or canoe on a peaceful river? Return with your children and remember the freedom and fun.
Creative parenting is fun parenting. Fire up your creative spark in both your thoughts and actions and just watch the spectacle as your children set off their own spectacular show of fireworks in reply. Bright and shiny in the world, they shall be.
More Fun and Less Work With Your Young Children
Toy Cubby
Nov 22, 2011 03:42:34
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